Rev. Dr. Michel Faulkner reflects on why the game continues to form identity, character, and culture long after the final whistle.

By Rev. Dr. Michel Faulkner

Most people don’t spend much time thinking about what actually shaped them. They point to moments, opportunities, or success, but they don’t always recognize the environments that formed how they think, how they respond, and who they become under pressure.

That’s where football is different. It doesn’t just show you who you are. It has a way of shaping you over time, often before you even realize it.

I’ve lived it, and I’ve seen it in others.

When I sat down with Rev. Lee Rouson, we weren’t just talking about the game itself. We were talking about what the game does to a person. What it builds, what it exposes, and what it demands. Lee said something early in the conversation that captured it in a way most people don’t think about. He said football is family, football is faith, football is discipline. He wasn’t describing a concept. He was describing a lived experience.

What Forms You Shows Up Early

For many of us, the game started as opportunity. In my case, it was simple. Football was my way to college. It was how I was going to get an education my family couldn’t afford. I wasn’t thinking about a professional career. I was thinking about a path forward. But over time, I began to understand that it was shaping more than my future. It was shaping how I saw myself.

Character Is Formed When It Costs You Something

The moment that carried the most weight in our conversation came from a story he shared about being ten years old. He made a Pop Warner team where he was the only Black player, while at the same time his sister was cut from a cheerleading squad because of her race. His father gave him a choice. He could stay on the team he had earned a place on, or he could walk away in protest.

He told me, “I was happy and I was sad at the same time. I made the team, but none of my boys made it, and I had to make a decision.” He chose to stay, not because it was easy, but because he believed leaving would not change anything. “If I quit right now, nothing’s going to change,” he said.

That decision, made at ten years old, did more than affect his own experience. It changed the environment around him. The following year, there were Black players on the team and Black girls on the cheerleading squad. What started as a personal decision became something that impacted a community.

Talent Isn’t What Separates People

That’s the part people miss when they look at sports from the outside. They see the game, but they don’t always see the moments inside the game where character is formed. They don’t see the decisions that carry weight beyond the field.

We spend a lot of time talking about talent, but talent alone is not what separates people. At a young age, most players are not that far apart physically. What begins to separate them is something deeper. It’s personality, discipline, and the willingness to step into situations that other people avoid.

I’ve seen players with ability struggle because they couldn’t handle failure. I’ve also seen players rise because they learned how to respond to it. Lee explained it in a way that connects beyond football. He said the game demands your physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual life to come together. If one of those areas is missing, it shows.

What the Game Is Really Doing

When you step back and look at it that way, you start to understand why football has such a lasting impact. It shapes families by giving them hope. It shapes individuals by forming identity. It can build discipline, but it can also expose where someone is not yet developed. I’ve seen families rally around a player, and I’ve seen players struggle when the game is taken away and they don’t know who they are without it.

That’s why this conversation matters. The game is never just the game. It becomes a training ground for how people think, how they respond, and what they become when they are tested.

And whether someone has played football or not, the reality is the same. Something is shaping them. The difference is that not everyone stops to ask what that is.

About the Author

Rev. Dr. Michel Faulkner is a contributor to MissionWake News and co-host of Football, Family, and Faith, where conversations explore the intersection of sports, leadership, and faith.

Listen to the podcast and learn more:
https://www.goalpostsandbeyond.com