Rev. Dr. Michel Faulkner reflects on why the hardest seasons in life are often the ones we try hardest to escape, and what happens when nothing we try actually works.
By Rev. Dr. Michel Faulkner
There are seasons in life where effort stops producing results.
You can do everything you know to do, make the right moves, stay disciplined, and still find yourself in a place where nothing seems to come together. Plans fall apart, opportunities don’t materialize, and the direction you thought you were heading no longer feels clear.
Most people respond to that by trying harder.
They look for another strategy, another connection, or another way to fix what is not working. The assumption is that if something is broken, it can be repaired with enough effort and the right approach. What makes that difficult is that some seasons are not meant to be fixed that way.
When I think about transition, especially after something as defining as football, this is the part that often goes unspoken. It is not just the end of a career. It is the beginning of a period where the old ways of thinking no longer produce the same results.
When Effort Stops Working
In that kind of season, it becomes natural to keep trying. You move from one idea to the next, believing that the next attempt will be the one that works. You put time, energy, and resources into building something new, only to watch it fall apart again.
That process can repeat itself more than once.
It is not always because the ideas are bad or the effort is lacking. Sometimes it is because the approach itself is incomplete. The mindset that worked in one season does not always carry over into the next.
That is where frustration begins to build, because it feels like the same effort that once produced results is no longer effective.
The Season You Cannot Control
At some point, it becomes clear that the issue is not just external.
The struggle is not only about what is happening around you. It is also about what is happening within you. There is a kind of pressure that comes when you realize that you cannot think your way out of it, work your way out of it, or force your way through it.
That is the moment where many people become stuck.
It feels like a darkness, not in a dramatic sense, but in the sense that clarity is missing. Direction is unclear, and the usual methods for moving forward are not producing anything. The natural response is to try to bring light into that situation on your own, to find a way out as quickly as possible.
What most people do not realize is that this kind of season has a purpose.
What You Learn When Nothing Works
There is something that happens when every attempt to fix your situation fails.
You begin to see that control was never as complete as you thought it was. The strategies that once gave you confidence begin to lose their effect, and the question shifts from “What do I need to do next?” to “What is actually happening here?”
That shift is uncomfortable, because it requires letting go of the idea that everything can be managed through effort alone.
For many people, this is the point where they start to understand the difference between working toward something and surrendering to something deeper. It is not about giving up responsibility. It is about recognizing that not every season responds to the same kind of effort.
Learning to Trust What You Cannot See
The hardest part of this process is learning to trust when there is no clear path forward.
In football, you are trained to respond, to adjust, to execute. There is always a next play, a next opportunity, a next way to move the chains. Life does not always work that way. There are moments where the next step is not obvious, and the only thing you can do is remain where you are until something becomes clear.
That requires a different kind of discipline.
It requires patience, but not passive waiting. It requires awareness, but not overreaction. It requires trust, even when there is no immediate evidence that things are changing.
That is not natural for most people, especially for those who are used to achieving through action.
What the Darkness Is Doing
When you look back on those seasons, you begin to understand that they were not empty.
They were shaping something that could not be developed any other way. They were forcing a separation between identity and performance, between control and trust, and between effort and surrender.
That does not make those seasons easy, and it does not remove the frustration that comes with them. What it does is give them meaning.
Because at some point, everyone will find themselves in a place where what they have always relied on no longer works.
The question is not how quickly you can get out of that season.
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About the Author
Rev. Dr. Michel Faulkner is a contributor to MissionWake News and co-host of Football, Family, and Faith, where conversations explore the intersection of sports, leadership, and faith.
Listen to the podcast and learn more:
https://www.goalpostsandbeyond.com
